The Flies Of The Lord

One of the things that distinguishes my neighborhood is that so many of our homes have porches. Indeed our neighborhood occasionally holds a porch festival, which draws several hundred people from all over this area to visit with us in what to many is a throw back to the gracious living of another era.  Weather permitting, there are few things I like to do better than read the papers and drink coffee on my porch.

I like it.  So do the flies.

Now, not every day..if it's just coffee, no flies. But if, as on a recent morning, I make the mistake of having more than just coffee, say a doughnut as well, it doesn't take long..ten minutes at the most and one or two come from somewhere to disrupt  my routine. How do they know?

The other morning it was glazed doughnut from Spaldings--a traditional Lexington  morning delight. Two came along to join in my meal. They must have been Spalding fans because they certainly were persistent.

Now I often do like something with my coffee..toast and jelly attracts flies also. But not like those sugary doughnuts did. I think I'm going to have to run an experiment--see how long it takes before the flies appear. I may start with cake doughnuts from Magees, then caramel glazed from Dunkin' Donuts, a sticky bun from Kroger's and so on.

I'm betting on the glazed from Spaldings. Maybe I could get a grant from UK Sociology to study this..especially if some federal research funds are available. It wouldn't be as silly as some federal grants I've seen..and the results, for me and for others, could be both delicious and helpful in keeping flies away from what should be a tranquil part of our day.

I'm just sayin'...